From Ned to Neil the V11, Namaste

okay sooo
i actually got some driving stories for you, carried out by my very own not so faithful purple swag wag, Leeroy
so please lend me your ears..well..eyes...whatever just keep reading

okay so out of all my stories im going to pick out 2 specific top notch instances

okay, so there are these three children i had to babysit last year. and. they. are. the. spawn. of. Satan.

you thinking im kidding? no. no no no
they are soo bad that after babysitting them for the first time last year, i swore i would never sit them again. funny part is i barely remember a lot of the incidents from last year. the only thing i remember is trying to change the middle son's diaper which he decided in the MIDDLE to throw a temper tantrum and roll around in his mess and run...
and thats not even the worst thing that happened
its all suppressed in the deep deep deep far corners of my mind

WELL my mother had decided to volunteer me without permission again.
thats cool mom. thats real cool.

so i left straight from work to drive ALL the way to west laurel when Leeroy decided to be an asshole and break down in the middle of the high way when i was going 75 miles an hour and had to be at their house in like 5 minutes, strangely similar to the last time i was on my way to babysit for some other people and my tire and ripe blew out and shredded

anywayy after an intense cussing and begging episode i baarreellyy managed to roll him in some unmarked sketchy parking lot surrounded by what seemed to be (excuse the semi-racially insensitive profiling) illegals.
and my parents refuse to sign me up for an auto class. yeah okay. i dont need it
i call my mom. no answer. same goes with my father sister and 98% of my friends.
then finally! David picks up! huzzaah! he asked where i was
my answer: *with stifled tears*"i donntt knooowwww"
that was fun.
oh and the kids were angels. perfect behaved angels...


onto a funnier story?
yes i think so
i shoulda started with this one
so i bought this dashboard buddha and he was amazing. my friend brian had dubbed him "Ned"

anywayy he way simply spectacular, and at that time Leeroy's a/c was faulty so on a very hot days i would roll down my windows. as i was turning on the road HE FLEW OUT THE WINDOW!!
he committed suicide!! like he couldnt take the heat or something!!
as if flying out the window wasnt bad enough, as he flew out, he got run over by all the cars trailing behind me!
twas a lementable day

so after a few lonely week and weeks i got a new buddha (who has yet to commit the unforgivable act thank god)
and i couldnt think of a name for him.
i was thinking either Tyrone or Snowball
Snowball like the Simpsons how they just keep renaming their cat snowball, snowball 11, snowball X111 etc etc
but then i quickly decided against it because people are going to know me for the dweebo i am.
theennn i found a bunch of frogs and names them Neil over and over and thats how the new buddhas name derived as Neil V11!!